Everything is a Roach; Like Your Face
Two things:
1. Lately we’ve been talking about how to ward off negative energy; which brings me to the ultimate comeback: “Your face, burn“. By proper use of “Your face, burn“, you can successfully deflect negative energy away from you. It’s kind of like the “I’m Rubber, You’re Glue” Effect. Example:
NegHead: “Ugh! You know what is so annoying?”
You: ”Your face? Burn!”
Bad energy successfully averted! As demonstrated above, the “Your face, burn” comeback renders you completely impervious to The Negs. You heard it here first, Folks… no need for credits or royalties; my gift to you (so don’t say I never gave ya nothin’).
2. If you’ve ever seen a roach in your apt., and you have the misfortune of seeing another one in your abode more than once, soon everything in your line of vision becomes a roach.
If you catch sight of a toasty crumb on the floor, first you think it’s a roach. Black thread on the carpet? Roach! Dried spinach leaflet on the kitchen floor? Roach! Unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be a known cure for this except for moving. I’d be interested in hearing if anyone else has suffered from this affliction and how you have overcome it; or not.
$@bs
Comments
Leave a Reply
lily nicole on 03.03.2009
I knew you had a thing for reading “men-seeking-men” on Craigslist and (call me naive) I had no idea it even existed. Myself, I used the ‘list for selling my crap and buying other people’s. You really do learn something new every day. Everyone has their fetishes. (Though I think this is more an obsessive hobby than a fetish. Just remember: accordions & bandoleóns.)
As far as seeing stuff out of the corner of your eye and thinking it something else, oh it’s happened to me. It’s just never been a roach (and fleas are hard to spot the with naked eye). I usually think I’m catching a disenfranchised spirit or someone from the faerie world before they slip into a crack in the wall. The again, look who you’re dealing with…accordions & bandoleóns, dude.
Andwho…I have to get back to seceding from the Union, though my motivation has been seriously curtailed ever since Oh-bang-me got elected. n*
Teresa on 03.03.2009
Holy eff, you said roaches and my eyelid started twitching. My first apartment in LA was a roach ranch. And I got those big motherfuckers that you can hear running across your floor. I broke my lease after I woke up in the middle of a night with a roach on my head. Word. I’m not lying.
So now, everything I see that is large and dark and on the floor is a roach to me. Sometimes I freak out at stuff on the walls, too. Sadly, I’ve found no way to overcome this problem. On the plus side, though, I now have an incredibly high tolerance for spiders.
The $@bs on 03.03.2009
ON YOUR HEAD??? OMG, that shit made me laugh my ass off. I can’t imagine how you ever slept with the lights off again!