Man Charged For Sex With Picnic Table
Nothing says summer like having sex in the outdoors, right? One man from Bellevue, OH, thinks so. But you may want to opt for a living human being instead of a metallic inanimate object… The 40-year-old was arrested after a neighbor videotaped him sexually engaged with a metal picnic table. He was seen fucking the table on at least four separate occasions. (Well at least it wasn’t a one night stand, but he should really treat it to dinner.)
How do you fuck a table? Authorities noted that the table had a hole in the middle intended for an umbrella. The (married) father of three is now facing felony counts of public indecency since his residence is in close proximity to an elementary school. The district’s police captain commented, “Once you think you’ve seen it all, something else comes around.” Yea, inside a picnic table, apparently. Kudos to RogBo for hookin’ us up with the unforgettable article!
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