11.12.2010

Browsing in adult novelty shops can be kind of an awkward experience depending on who else is in the store and who’s behind the register. The state of Alabama would tend to agree; especially since sex toys are technically illegal there. Introducing Pleasures:  the country’s first sex-toy drive-thru service located in Huntsville, AL.

AL’s anti-obscenity law has been in effect since 1998, but officials said the sex toy ban was not intentional but it was the result of “borrowing language from other states with similar laws.” The law makes an exception to the sale of items designed for “stimulation of human genital organs” if the sale is  for “a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial or law enforcement purpose“. Essentially, customers can’t purchase sex toys unless they fill out a medical questionnaire describing  health-related reasons for the  purchase.

The shop owner, Sherri Williams, says her shop is the first in the nation to offer car service, which she hopes will help eliminate the stigma from sex shops. “The real essence of what I’m trying to get across is adult stores don’t have to be hidden in back alleys,” she stated. Formerly a bank, the store has three drive-thru lanes and offers customers a menu of toys, lubricants and stimulants. Purchases are sold in plain, brown paper bags at the window. The store plans to give away condoms as a public service and will also feature an “intimacy clinic“, offering weekly seminars on marriage counseling and a sexual health library. However, the store will NOT be selling any adult videos. (Aaaand their profits just plummeted.)

nudenymphJust another reason why Alabama scares me (sorry in advance to my large contingent of Alabamian readers)…

As illustrated here, the Cycles Gladiator Wine label recalls the vintage 1895 advertising poster for Cycles Gladiator bicycles. The poster features a nymph whose bare breasted flying beside a winged bicycle created all the controversy.

The Alcoholic Beverage Control Board rejected the label last year, ruling that the label was inappropriate and advising restaurants and stores that they were prohibited from selling the product. Apparently the state’s liquor regulations do not permit labels with “a person posed in an immoral or sensuous manner“. (But: A. Nymphs are not human and B. You can’t even see her vajayjay, so wtf?)

Earlier this month, some southern hick of a no-life busy body reported that the bottle was, in fact, being sold locally (no doubt since the whole issue is clearly retardo), sending a bottle to the board’s enforcement bureau. The board then sent a letter to all local liquor stores and restaurants to remind them that sale of the product is not allowed. The manufacturer of the wine responded that their product had been sold in AL since 2006 until the recent unpleasantness and that there haven’t been any problems in the other 49 states where it is sold.

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