Now all of the extremely uncomfortable moments can be yours again by watching the sex ed videos captured here. See Ricky jerk off to his mom’s voice. Watch Jimmy get into a car with a sick fuck. Learn about “this business of nocturnal emissions“. A big shout out to JoRu for hooking us up with this gem! To see all videos, click here.

He told me he knew of an adult room close by and offered to take me there. It was empty save some sparse furniture and he explained that it was just a private “play area”. Attempting to remove my clothing, I also removed my hair, my legs below the knee, and somehow ended up giving a blowjob to a couch. It was a very awkward situation but to make matters worse, then the app crashed and I’m sure he saw some bald paraplegic go from dry sucking a couch to disappearing altogether. This was not going well.

When I was able to return, I tried taking off my clothes and again was unsuccessful. When I inquired as to what the problem might be, he asked me if I had any skin (huh)? Apparently, I didn’t have a vagina yet. He game me a bunch of skins and took me somewhere to “try them on”. I realized that it was a box full of body shapes, ethnicities, etc. I didn’t really care much about this so I just picked one. He didn’t like it and so I went back to picking vaginas.

The latency of the program was causing all sorts of errors. Suddenly I wasn’t into this anymore. I wasn’t there to browse body types and pubic hair, I just wanted to see a couple of cartoons fucking. He must have been multitasking as he waited for me to try on stuff because he didn’t respond when I thanked him for his time and told him I was going to bed. More like 2nd waste of my life. I think this time I learned my lesson.

$@bs

I was meeting a friend at a clinic to take her home after terminating an unwanted pregnancy. The waiting area was pretty full when I arrived so it took me a moment to find my friend. I finally spotted her and took a seat beside her.

I then tried to entertain her with zany antics so as to take away from the horror of our surroundings. I was in the middle of Act I when I looked up and noticed a man sitting no more than two feet from us.  I thought he was pretty cute and there was something familiar about him. After another second I realized it was someone I used to date. He looked up at just that moment and we made eye contact. AWKWARD. We said hello but not much else.

He was obviously there having impregnated someone and was waiting for her to return from the procedure. I thanked God that I wasn’t there for my own appointment. Soon my friend’s name was called and we were left with the uncomfortable task of sitting there, practically next to each other.  Pleasant conversation was altogether impossible; we tried to avoid eye contact. Soon I busied myself with a book and nodded off.  When I awoke, much to my relief he had left.

$@bs