Witnesses described the suspect as wearing red and white face makeup (Ronald McDonald?), a red and purple wig, a fake nose and a denim dress (NOT Ronald McDonald). Employees told the police they didn’t think anything was peculiar when he walked into the store (ummm… ok) because of local Pridefest events taking place that weekend. (Now, if they knew anything about gay men, they would have known that no self respecting queen would be seen wearing the outfit witnesses outlined. That’s why God invented the Fashion Police!)

The cashier reported that the man entered the store and approached an employee, asking for help in a feminine voice and saying that ‘shis’ husband was out of work. After being access denied by the employee, the man walked to the checkout stand, revealed a pistol, demanded the cash and bolted just as two other customers were walking into the store. I was disappointed there was no footage of this, but then learned that a surveillance picture is expected to be released presently.

$@bs