A taxi driver in the UK was forced to remove a small blue glass cross from his dashboard after a passenger complained that it looked too much like a penis. (Crucifdix?)
The driver, a devout Catholic, had kept the small Greek cross in his cab for years without problem and was shocked when he received his first-ever complaint, made by what turned out to be a 15-year-old on his way to school who saw the cross and couldn’t help but associate it with genitalia.
Local authorities took the wisenheimer’s complaint seriously and ordered it removed. Upon realizing they were taking advice from a pubescent punk, authorities realized they handled the issue badly.
This was particularly obvious when later that same day, on the other side of town, the council forced a local baker to remove his skullcap after a 13-year-old complained that his head was too reminiscent of “a giant tit.” (Well, he did have a point…)
Taxi Driver Beaten by Sex Couple
A cab driver took a beat down with a high heel shoe after he refused to leave the car so a couple could have sex in the back seat. The couple, a 25 year old male and 23 year old female, allegedly hailed the taxi early Halloween. (Maybe they were just dressed up as people trying to have sex.)
They directed the taxi driver toward a destination, and upon arrival they allegedly demanded he leave the car so they could have sex. Police reported that they then told the driver to get in the passenger seat before driving him to another town.
At this point, the driver took the opportunity to call for help. The couple then attacked the driver, punching him in the head and hitting him with a high heel shoe, refusing to pay the $72 fare.
The pair fled on foot but was later found nearby by police. Both have been charged with aggravated assault, illegal use of a taxi and failure to pay the fare. The taxi driver received a chipped tooth in the attack (plus, no peep show).
Police Shocked by Nude Driver
“Is that a stick shift or are you just excited to see men in uniform?” Detectives in Ware County, GA pulled over a car that was weaving in and out of lanes. Approaching the vehicle, the detectives were shocked (and kinda turned on?) to find the male driver naked.
Since there is no law against driving naked, (hmmmm) detectives released the man after ordering him to put his clothes on and advising that he keep them on. Ladies: when crying doesn’t work, this might just be a new way to get out of speeding tickets…
$@bs
Can’t Help But Be a Part of It: NY, NY
I took this weekend off from the computer and felt like I was cheating on my blog. To my defense, I was out of town, and when I am, it is no more evident that I should not be leaving my city. Recently I’ve been expressing frustration with New York for months now, but even though I enjoy leaving, I’m not sure other cities enjoy my visit.
Par example: I had to take a shuttle from O’Hare Airport to the hotel at which I was staying. The Native American driver, whom I like to call Chief Molasses Ass, was driving BELOW the speed limit. I had to exert a lot of control over my mouth to refrain from asking whether he wouldn’t mind going a little bit faster (like the speed limit, just for instance).
The driver was too busy engaged in conversation with the other passengers on the shuttle, namely a couple from Rochester and a woman from Ft. Lauderdale. I couldn’t roll my eyes back far enough. I had to turn on my iPod at maximum volume to drone out their meaningless and ever-so-irritating chit chat.
When I was finally the last passenger left, I thought that would get things moving, but no. He wanted to be my private tour guide and insisted on telling me everything he knew about every street, building and anything else we passed. There was only one way out: I faked a phone call and chatted with myself for the last ten minutes of the torturous ride, until after what seemed like eternity, we finally reached my destination.
The point of this story: while NYC tends to be too much, every other city is just not enough: not diverse enough, not cool enough and definitely not fast enough! In short, I don’t think another city is big enough for me and my attitude.
$@bs
