Ring Toss Game on the Boss’ Penis
How do you play lawn games in the winter? A woman from Eugene, OR can tell you… She says the couple who own the hotel where she worked encouraged their employees to play a game of ring toss on the husband’s penis. Her employers apparently threw a party at the hotel (emphasis on ‘ho’), where the husband danced naked and jerked off while guests guessed the size and circumference of his shaft.
One of their female employees is now alleging “civil rights violations, sexual harassment, hostile workplace and constructive termination“. She says she worked at the hotel for 3 years until their questionable behavior forced her to resign. In particular, the wife “talked about her sexual fantasies and asked the plaintiff and other employees for advice or suggestions“.
During the incident in question, the couple threw a private party at the hotel on a day when their soon-to-be scarred employee had to work. When the party began, the husband stripped down to thong underwear in the restaurant-bar and began giving lap dances to employees and guests alike. Shortly after, he removed the thong and shit got real. At that point, the wife reportedly asked guests and employees to guess the measurements of her husband’s penis, asking employees to rub lotion on him. The husband then began masturbating in front of everyone so as to measure his erect penis; and so others could play a ring toss game on his dick. The female employee stated that she left while the party was still in ‘full swing’ (interesting choice of words for a sexcentric party) and is now suing for $900,000. The good news: Sounds like this hotel has an opening.
The Curved Cock Conundrum
Not straight, (but not necessarily gay), the curved cock phenomenon is not at all uncommon. Most penises curve at least a little; they can even point down when erect (owie). According to medical professionals, the only problem with anything more than a 30-degree deviation is the possibility that it can limit the number of sexual positions comfortable for both partners. In that case there are procedures that can help straighten you out.
The treatment to straighten curvature is a surgery called plication. It actually sounds quite horrible and uses such disturbing language as “degloving the penis” and “pulling the skin down”, but essentially the procedure shortens the longer side of the penis so both sides match. Though many men feel self conscious of any curvature, from a woman’s perspective, curving in the right direction is not at all a bad thing. Sometimes the curve can result in easier access to just the right spot!
