Man Tattoos ‘MINI’ On Penis to Win a Car
Think The Price is Right is the only way to win a new car? Not anymore! A German radio station recently held a contest asking listeners how far they would go to win a new Mini Cooper. The winning entry was from a 39-year old man who stated that he’d tattoo the word ‘mini‘ on his manhood to win the £20,000 vehicle.
As if the idea itself were not thoroughly entertaining enough, the ink-work was done live on-air so listeners could hear the play-by-play of the entire process. Despite his audible public, pubic agony, the winner said that he didn’t regret his decision, but rather stated that, “Once I’m sitting in the car, it won’t matter anymore. Then the pain will be gone and it’ll be alright.” But his penis is not so sure…
Urinating Party-Goer Short-Circuits Club
Ever hear of a pee-pee dance? Some people think it’s the move you do when you have to go to the bathroom. Others define this as dropping your pants in the middle of a dance-floor and pissing on a spark plug, shorting out the circuits. Admittedly, the latter creates slightly more of a spectacle when enjoying a night on the town… One German clubber decided to do just that at the popular hot spot, Americanos club, in Munich. He reportedly dropped his pants in the middle of the packed club and urinated on a plug socket, shorting out all of the circuits.
After his little stunt, the club was forced to throw everyone out and close down for the night, only able to reopen the following day after electricians were called out to fix the problem. The 27-year-old man was quickly grabbed by bouncers when they spotted him pissing on the plug, an action which he never explained. Police hypothesized that the man had beef with the club owner, but this was never proven.
Desperate times call for desperate measures; in all industries. Recently German brothels began offering customers the chance to sleep with as many prostitutes as they want for one flat rate. The promotion is based on the ‘all-you-can-eat buffet’ model and was introduced by brothel owners in response to the 30% decrease in business the trade has experienced since the economic downturn.
The flat-rate deals, priced as low as £60 (about $100), have generated controversy in the country despite that prostitution is legal and has been historically well-tolerated. But certain politicians have expressed disgust at the recession-busting deals, stating that, “So-called flat-rate sex is an immoral development which cannot be tolerated in our society.” (But isn’t the idea of prostitution itself a little questionable in that regard?)
The vocal minority of politicians who object to the promotion have ordered police raids on the clubs to bring the offer to an end. However, since the promotion is not illegal, officers have focused raids on immigration and hygiene issues where the promotion has been introduced.
Other promotional ideas have included rebates for pensioners and men on benefits, 10% discounts for cyclists and men arriving by public transport, and free shoe-polishing for customers who stay overnight. (Overnight??? Um… ew.)
Jelly and Hermaphrodite Tennis
Two items on the agenda today, as listed by the posting title du jour:
1. Jelly: In accordance with the prophecy, I’ve been spending way too much time at home, alone, with my two favorite screens (see “Geeky is the New Cool“). So, how excited was I when a friend from Twitter, sent me information about a semi-weekly, informal work together called Jelly? Um… very! This is the perfect solution to my recent new low of watching Jerry Springer on DVR (that’s right, I recorded it, so what of it?). In conclusion, I was able to get out of the house today and though there are only 3 people here right now, it’s already more comfortable than being on my own sofa. Plus someone else has already made coffee – SCORE!
2. Hermaphrodite Tennis – 
Today reports came out concerning a (rather tasty) 22 year old German female, Sarah Gronert, who was born with both male and female genitalia. The controversy is over Gronert’s decision to compete in women’s tennis, which has some in the tennis community upset. “There is no girl who can hit serves like that, not even Venus Williams,” says the coach of an opponent Gronert recently beat. The coach, Schlomo Tzoref, also claims, “This is not a woman, it’s a man.” Some view Tzoref as nothing more than a disgruntled coach, while others questions if there’s any validity to his claim.
Despite having undergone surgery to become a certified woman, medical professionals commented that Gronert may have had one of about 20 or 30 different interesex conditions, each of which may have different levels of 
testosterone and require different procedures. Depending on which specific condition she has, Gronert may have male hormones, which could lead to elevated testosterone levels and muscle mass. If left untreated, an excess of testosterone would give Gronert an unfair advantage, creating her own source of a steroid. Depending on the rules, she could be disqualified.
However, if born a true hermaphrodite, with an ovary on one side and a testicle on the other, removal of the testicle would result in normal testosterone levels following the procedure and Gronert would be just like any other female — ovulating and menstruating — meaning she wouldn’t have any advantage over any other female tennis player.
I’m really interested in what the result of this story is, which has yet to be determined. Regardless, sucks to have your sexuality discussed in a global open forum. Click here to access the full story.
