It's My World, Ur Just a Squirrel » salon http://thesabs.com Because I'm a media whore with a dirty mind and a penchant for laughter... Fri, 18 Nov 2011 20:27:55 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 Vattoos are the New Vajazzles http://thesabs.com/vattoos-are-the-new-vajazzles/ http://thesabs.com/vattoos-are-the-new-vajazzles/#comments Tue, 27 Jul 2010 20:20:37 +0000 The $@bs http://thesabs.com/?p=4606 If you’re still having Swarovski crystals glued to your puss, you’re way behind (in front). Now, all the va-rage is vattoos: temporary tattoos for your gyner. Select NYC spas have started offering women temporary vaginal tattoos; not temporary tattoos OF vaginas, but tattoos FOR vaginas.

The temporary tattoos last about five days and are applied with airbrushed ink. Clients can choose from designs including a flower, butterfly, sun, or calligraphy letters inked in a color of your choice.

You won’t find these babies in a Cracker Jack box, so better make an appointment. I’m thinking a ‘tear here‘ twattoo written in calligraphy would be perfect above my cooter…

]]> http://thesabs.com/vattoos-are-the-new-vajazzles/feed/ 0 Hair Don’t http://thesabs.com/hair-dont/ http://thesabs.com/hair-dont/#comments Fri, 08 Aug 2008 21:06:00 +0000 The $@bs http://thesabs.com/?p=5 I just got my hair cut this week. I hate getting it trimmed since I’ve been trying to grow it out for years. Basically, after I moved to Amherst for one intolerable semester at UMASS, I finally decided to cut my hair extremely short, which I had always wanted to do but never had the balls to disobey my father’s wish of Lady Godiva length locks. I’ve been trying to grow it back ever since (talk about Karma).

I really didn’t want to cut off much at all, just a trim for the ends is all I hoped for. My hairdresser asks me what I want to do, and then blatantly disregards my requests. Does anyone else feel intimidated by a service provider whom the see regularly?

My hairdresser is a very good looking Russian guy and I don’t have the where-with-all to fight back, mostly because I spend the entire time in the chair being preoccupied with whether he is focusing on my bald spot, a rather large dent in the back of my head, a small lump at the top of my crown, or a case of psoriasis I have never quite been able to kick.

Usually by the time my insecurities reach their peak potency, the length of my hair is a non-issue. Not like it matters since my hair is so curly it looks the same no matter what is done with it.

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