Teens Filmed Sex Act Fearing Doomsday Device
At least 3 high school students are under investigation after allegedly filming sex acts that occurred when some students falsely assumed that the Large Hadron Collider was about to end the world.
The event occurred after the launch of the particle accelerator ring, the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), which some have lovingly dubbed a “doomsday device”. The two students who engaged in intercourse were 13 and 15 and performed the sex acts in the bathroom during school hours several months ago.
Sources say that the girl wanted to lose her virginity before the world ended (yea, my dad wouldn’t buy that one either). Another student filmed the act on his cell phone without the girl’s knowledge and circulated it around the school and the wider community.
Police warn that those responsible for recording and distributing the footage could be charged with producing child porn, (though doubtful given the ages of the teens). Police went on to say that it’s not the first time they’ve investigated cases involving students producing sex videos, which have been circulated via text or the web. (Well, no shit.)
New Hotel Offers Peep Show to Passersby
For all you couch potatoes out there, here’s a new reason to get out and enjoy the outdoors: free local sex acts. The Standard Hotel which recently opened in NYC is fulfilling its promise of packing meat in the city’s Meatpacking district. The former railroad trestle turned local peep show invites horny hotel guests to perform sex acts in front of the building’s floor-to-ceiling windows.
Neighbors report seeing men masturbating, porn films being shot and couples having intercourse in full view of the High Line Park path that runs alongside the hotel. One local business manager at the next door bar, Brass Monkey, stated. “I’ve seen at least 10 different people having sex. Saturday nights are the best time for the show.” (Note to self: keep Saturday nights open.)
Before the story broke and created controversy, the hotel’s Facebook page encourage guests to perform said “sexy parties”, stating: “We encourage you to exercise your inner exhibitionist. Please share your intimate, and explicit photos with us — those floor to ceiling windows aren’t just for the views . . .”
Another witness who works in the area stated, “We saw a naked girl jumping up and down on a trampoline right in front of the window.” NYC City Council Speaker Christine Quinn told The Post she hopes to bring the show to an end. (Every party has a pooper.)
