Jury Acquits Costume ‘Flasher’
If you’re going to flash a group of kids, you better mean it, Buster. A Floridian man was accused of exposing himself in front of a school bus filled with high school students, but as it turns out, he never actually showed his junk. According to police, the 22-year-old didn’t expose himself as alleged, but rather employed the use of a Halloween costume featuring a large fake penis.
The costume had been given to him by a co-worker who said it was made by a 90-year-old woman. (Because 90-year-old women sewing together synthetic cocks is a completely normal, common thing.) The man stated that he had intended to get a laugh, but it was a joke no one found funny. (No one except me…)
The young man faced 30 years in prison if convicted of lewd and lascivious exposure in front of two 14-year-old boys, who thought they had seen a real penis. (I guess their own genitalia isn’t helping them to determine the difference between a real one and a fake one just yet.) The defendant also faced being listed as a sex offender for the rest of his life, but was acquitted since the two boys couldn’t prove that they had seen a real penis.
Sex Offender Busted By Burglars
A 24 year old man from North Yorkshire, UK was sentenced to three and a half years in prison after thieves discovered images and video footage of child abuse and child pornography on his stolen laptop and went to police. The laptop was stolen during a burglary in August of last year. However, once the burglars saw the content on the laptop, they turned it over to authorities by way of a tip off. The detective handling the case commented that even though the thieves were committing a crime themselves, it’s commendable that they helped bring a serious offender to justice.
Under investigation, the suspect confessed to downloading child pornography and speaking to underage girls in chat rooms, one of whom he had exposed himself to via webcam. When questioned, the girl admitted that she had felt degraded and humiliated, resorting to self harm.
The judge presiding over the case ruled that the suspect ‘conducted a calculated scam against the girl’ and sentenced him to three and a half years in prison. In addition he’s been banned from working with children for the rest of his life and will be issued with a ’sexual offences prevention order’.
Since the arrest, a 38-year-old man and a 20-year-old woman were arrested in connection with the theft. Both were sentenced to 12-month community order.
PS: This guy kind of looks like someone I used to work with; which makes me giggle.
