Catch the Flow: The Menstrual Cup
As a female, we have but two choices: and I don’t mean death or oongaboonga. You can shove a stick of cotton up there, hope there’s no overflow, and pull a warm gooey wad of blood out of yourself hours later, better known as a tampon.
Or you can place a would-be padded post it on your panties and glimpse the contents of your uterus leaking out every time you pee: the pad. Isn’t there a better solution? Not as of yet, but we just found out about a worse one: The Menstrual Cup.
The Menstrual Cup is a small silicone or latex container that holds about an ounce of period blood. You insert it into your vagina like a tampon and twice a day, you take it out and pour the blood into the toilet. Then rinse, vomit, and repeat. Apparently some sick bitches love this technique, and I have to admit, they make a good case for why we should make the switch from tampons and pads.
1. Money/Cash. The cup costs between $20-$40. Ladies spend that much in tampons and pads in a matter of months, but the cup can last for years.
2. Vaginally Green: Pads, tampons and plastic applicators satiate a landfill’s belly. Even Kermit knows it’s not easy being green, but this is a pretty simple way to give back to Muth Natche.
3. Hide the Crimson Tide: No need to worry about leakage or that ever-so-annoying little white string hanging seductively from your crotch. Added bonus: no risk of toxic shock syndrome.
Want to know more? Check out this (somewhat disturbing) vid:
Testicle Enlargement: How and Why
Who can go a day without receiving scores of promotions for penis enlargement products? Even if you have no penis and are not in the market to buy one, you’re not likely to escape. But what if you want to enlarge your balls? You may be asking yourself, “Why would I want to do that?” While they seem to be the rather low hanging fruit of the genitalia realm, some men want this done to feel more… manly.
So you’ve decided to enlarge your testicles. Now what? Well you have a few options. Option #1 is the old scrotum pump; or you can get a penis pump big enough to accommodate all of your junk. Option #2 is to use weights which clamp around the scrotum above the testicles so that your balls appear bigger. For the long-term fix you, can opt for surgically placed scrotal implants, made from stainless steel, titanium, silicone, or other implant-grade material. While I’m not sure I’d be impressed with a larger set of testes, ‘balls of steel’ does have a certain ring to it…
