Naked Woman Steals Taxi Cab
If you live in Brooklyn, you already know how hard it can be to get a cab to take you where you want to go. No one knows this better one Louisiana woman. The woman asked the driver to take her all the way to Michigan, over a thousand miles away, which he refused to do. (Not that anyone blames him.)
In response to this, she attempted to convince him by taking off all of her clothes. (Which seems like it should have worked.) Still, no dice. Despite the driver’s repeated requests that she dress, the woman ignored him.
Unsure of how to handle the situation, the cabbie drove to the nearest police station and went inside to seek help. At this point the woman took off in the cab (presumably to MI). Cops caught up with her about a block away and forcibly removed the drunk woman from it. The woman was jailed for a few days but released on a $75 signature bond.
Naked Fist Fight Shocks Cafe Patrons
In an episode that clearly should have been aired on Spike TV, a woman stripped naked in front of a crowd of people innocently dining at a restaurant in Australia yesterday. Witnesses reported that the woman took off all her clothes when she got into a full-on fist fight with another woman over a man.
Police said that the 39-year-old woman was picked up from a median strip on Dick Ward Drive (note the irony) after she tore off all of her clothes. Restaurant customers were reportedly unimpressed (obviously an ‘A’ cup).
One witness commented, “She was pretty much just defending herself and then she was lifting up her shirt and showing her breasts. She took off her clothes and then she walked to the median strip, lit a cigarette and laid down.” Police found the woman lying naked, still in full view of patrons at the restaurant. She was given a fine and taken home in a paddy wagon. Aussies apparently don’t have very advanced phones since NO footage is available of the encounter. Thanks for nothin’, Australia.
If you suck at cards, better not practice your bluffing skills during a game of strip poker. Two people were caught running naked down the street early in the morning. Cops first saw a woman jogging down the street, completely butt-ass naked. When back up officers were called to deal with the “crime”, they found both a naked woman and a naked man hiding behind a fence.
The naked couple told the cops that they were losers in a game of strip poker and had no choice but to run around the block towards home, sans clothing. The cops then escorted the naked couple back to the apartment where the game was still in full swing. Police then met the full round of players of the strip poker tournament, who were described as only “half naked.” Now, in a game of strip poker, the only one way to keep score is to keep your clothes off (or on, depending on your performance). The kind officers did not force anyone to lose track of their position in the game, but allowed the naked couple to find their clothing and dress only because they had lost and were, therefore, out of the game.
While the couple was dressing, the cops had no problem hanging out in the apartment while the poker game continued and more clothes were shed; presumably to provide poker playing tips. They issued only a verbal warning and didn’t arrest the man or woman for their naked sprint since it occurred at a time when it was unlikely for anyone to see them, except for the policeman who first spotted them; and then, of course, all his friends who arrived for backup.
Woman Attempts to Evade Cops by Stripping
Police followed a woman home last week accused of stealing beef jerky and a lighter from a convenience store. Authorities say that she refused to answer the door when they arrived at her residence, becoming belligerent and argumentative.
She then began berating her three children, loudly blaming one for her shoplifting incident. When police entered the home in order to stabilize the situation, they say that the woman began to strip in front of the three children, asserting that the officers could not arrest her naked. (See how wrong you can be?)
Resisting arrest, she kicked an officer in the groin and spit at another. Police continued that she then exposed herself against the cruiser window, and registered a blood-alcohol level of 0.112 percent.
The woman is now facing charges of felony battery of an officer, resisting an officer, shoplifting and two counts of disorderly conduct.
