Led by a female tenant, the angered tenants gathered together, blaming the problem on the victim. The landlord’s representatives tried to tell tenants that the eviction was an independent decision and that the victim had also been given notice to vacate the residence. All were encouraged to live out the remaining days of tenancy in peace.

After the meeting, everyone went back to their rooms, except one woman who stood in front of the couple’s room, barking insults. She then jumped the pregnant wife and hit her with a wooden plank, fists and buckets. The husband ran to help his wife, but two men held him down and the violent woman bit off two layers of his scrotum. Describing the pain as unbearable (as one might imagine), the man is expected to receive surgery on the injury in the days to come. (NOT the days to cum obvious reasons…) Note to self: Don’t fuck with Nigerian women.

First he took a big stone, threw it up in the air and allowed it to fall on his head, which led to serious head injuries. Then he jumped into a well. Finally, he cut his testicles out of the scrotal sacs with a broken bottle and flung them out of site. Rushed to a local medical center, the man underwent a four hour surgical procedure to repair the damaged sperm ducts. Medical professionals treating the man stated that he would have have bled to death internally if he hadn’t received medical attention immediately. His scrotum was still swollen, having used an unsterile object to cut out the testes.

On the bright side, the man will still be able to have sex, but obviously won’t be able to procreate.  Luckily he’s married with three children. It’s believed that he’ll now be facing charges for attempted suicide. (Good idea, Africa. That will cure him of depression for sure.) When questioned about his behavior, the man stated, “I just got fed up with life. I had no money again and I became frustrated. That led to my actions.” Naturally the first solution one would think up in this situation is removing your testicles and throwing them out of sight…

The 43-year-old stated, ”I guess they were scared when I suddenly landed in the tank so they started wriggling everywhere. Several shot up my trouser leg. And then to my horror I felt one go up my bottom.”

The man attempted to continue with his work, but was in too much pain to do so. Emergency medical professionals were contacted when he later collapsed. Doctors were able to remove the eel in a surgical procedure which lasted five hours. A spokesperson for the hospital noted that, “the eel was as wide as two fingers and as long as a man’s arm.” So, uh, hintedy, hint-hint.

The doctor treating the victim noted that as a result of the increasingly popular game (thank you, Youtube), he’s had to perform three to four surgeries a year on boys with ruptured testicles or problems resulting from groin punches. The doctor added that dozens more come in with less severe injuries ranging from high school to elementary school students.

The victim’s family plans to move to a different school district since this was not an isolated incident. They are currently looking into filing criminal charges against the other student.

Now many Chinese street vendors offer artificial hymens or ‘maidenheads’, which inflate inside the vagina and can then be ‘popped’ open with a penis. There are many artificial hymen kits on the market now, such as Night Red, Virtuous Girl Red, and Joan of ARC Red. Disappointingly enough, I haven’t been able to find a link where one may purchase these online. Personally, I think I’m too old to try this, but if I ever decide to become a born again virgin, it will come in handy.

The treatment to straighten curvature is a surgery called plication. It actually sounds quite horrible and uses such disturbing language as “degloving the penis” and “pulling the skin down”, but essentially the procedure shortens the longer side of the penis so both sides match. Though many men feel self conscious of any curvature, from a woman’s perspective, curving in the right direction is not at all a bad thing. Sometimes the curve can result in easier access to just the right spot!

However, experts claim that most women undergoing this treatment aren’t properly educated about the procedure. Studies show that women who choose to have this operation, known as a Labioplasty, could have health problems later on since research hasn’t been done on the long-term effects. Research teams added that it is also possible that surgery can increase sexual problems by damaging the nerve supply to the area, leading to impaired sexual sensitivity and satisfaction (SO not worth the risk).

The attack appears to have been unprovoked and random.

Medical records indicate that the force of the kick pushed one of the victim´s testicles into his abdomen!

He then had to undergo surgery to repair the damage, when doctors discovered that the testicle had ruptured and were forced to remove it.

(Ok, even I felt that and I don’t even have any testicles… anymore.)

Authorities stated that three such attacks have been reported in recent weeks.

Police also believe that there may be others victims of this woman who have not reported the attacks and are investigating further (and covering their testicles while doing so).

They cite the example of a young Irishman, who reports having his penis enlarged at a clinic in Zagreb, Croatia for 60 percent less than it would have cost in the United States. (What a deal!)

The lad was ready to pay almost $17K for the surgery in the States, but, thanks to the World Wide Web, he stumbled upon a Croatian clinic and got his desired results for less than $7K. (So, does he, like, have a girlfriend?)