Mother Destroys Giant Snow Penis
How much more memorable would the song have been if the lyrics were “Frosty The Snow Cock?” According to one pretty fucking funny Brit, MUCH more memorable.
Instead of your traditional snowman, he decided to celebrate the season by surprising his mother by constructing an enormous snowpenis on their front lawn.
Even better: He videotapes her reaction and posts it on Youtube. Although she initially seems amused, she ultimately ruins it. Boo! Damn funny nonetheless – click here to watch! Cheers, mate!
Gumby Attacked; Kicked in Groin
Who takes one look at that lovable, green character and thinks, “I’m gonna kick him in the balls!” At least one person from Michigan. On a day that seemed innocent enough in Flint Township, a man dressed in a Gumby costume stood at the side of the road waving to passersby. One moment he was delighting children in the noonday sun, and the next minute he was curled up in fetal position cradling his family jewels.
In an unforgettable YouTube moment that Gumby would prefer to forget (and which I CANNOT find), he was attacked and kicked in the groin by another man. But it’s only thanks to that YouTube vid, that the drive by ball-kicker was located. The 28-year-old Gumby is an employee of a local costume store and was dressed up to draw patrons into the store for Halloween. He was only into his second or third hour as Gumby when he was approached from behind by a teen, who called for his attention, then kicked him in the groin.
Luckily, Gumby wasn’t badly hurt since the costume’s extra padding absorbed the blow (also since he’s made of clay). Police investigating the incident believed the perpetrator did this for a reason; probably to post a funny video online. Searching on YouTube, the officer found a video of the incident, which included the perp’s first name. It wasn’t difficult to further identify him by looking at vids posted by the same user. Police were soon able to find the suspect’s Facebook page and located him. He’s now being charged with misdemeanor assault. Additionally charges could be coming against the driver and cameraman. Pokey was not available for comment.
If you’ve ever been hit in the nuts, you know this is no laughing matter. Heck, I know that and I don’t even have balls (anymore). But to many high school students, nothing beats a good game of ‘sack tap‘. One 14-year-old had to learn this the hard way after having his right testicle removed from a groin punch while walking to class.
The doctor treating the victim noted that as a result of the increasingly popular game (thank you, Youtube), he’s had to perform three to four surgeries a year on boys with ruptured testicles or problems resulting from groin punches. The doctor added that dozens more come in with less severe injuries ranging from high school to elementary school students.
The victim’s family plans to move to a different school district since this was not an isolated incident. They are currently looking into filing criminal charges against the other student.
